But What If I fail?
I'm staring at the screen, wishing the words would come easier. They're there, wrapped up in some part of my head that feels a little unaccessible at the moment. The wrapping; layers of self doubt, perfectionism and pressure... winding around them tightly. Writing should come easily, I do it every day as part of my job; and yet when the pressure is on, it seems a much more difficult task. I'm used to deadlines, it comes part and parcel of working in content and media. It's st
My Lifelong Battle with Eating Disorders
My battle with mental illness began at such a young age that I don’t really know what it’s like not to have one. I became fearful and anxious around food when I was five years old. After seeing a family member become unwell I thought that I would become poorly if I ate food too. 'I was geeky, ugly and hated myself' As I grew older food became more of an issue. First it was about fear, then it was about perfectionism and control. By the end of primary school not eating had bec
6 Months
It’s 6 months today since Mum died. There aren’t really any words to put to it. It’s just a fact. A lot has changed in the past 6 months. I live somewhere new, I’ve made new friends, I’ve lost a few friends, I stopped going to uni and started volunteering at a few places and doing a course at Mind, I started a new job, and I’m slowly trying to develop some sort of a social life. There have been some great things and some not-so-great things. I thought maybe I’d start to miss
'But You Don't Look Depressed?'
It's Depression Awareness Week this week. Mental health is not something I usually blog about (explicitly) but hey, there's a first time for everything. Depression is arguably more talked about now than it was a few years ago. It seems to be one of the more accepted mental illnesses. I think most people have had at least one day in their life where they've felt almost inexplicably completely bummed out, so it is something many people feel they can relate to on some level. Bei
The Great Grief Identity Crisis
I'm having a bit of an identity crisis. I've always defined myself by what I do, or how I relate to others, but it all seems to be a bit mixed up right now. I'm not at uni, so I'm not a student. I am working, so I am employed, but only one day a week, so that always leads to questions about what I do with the other six days... I am a daughter, though one without a Mum. I am a niece, sister, cousin and granddaughter, but none of these are really talking points. People keep tel
